Friday, May 27, 2011


I knew that would get your attention. And this post really is about sex, or not having any.

So when you're 14 and on your way to High School in the fall, there's stuff that needs to be discussed. Some people don't like to discuss it and I am sitting in a house of 4 people that would rather debate the efficacy of mold retardants than talk about sex.

After confirmation, the church decided it was really important to beat the confirmands senseless with what they should and should definitely not be doing in high school, or anywhere while in high school. In our case, knocking up young ladies.  There were two sessions about keeping yourself pure and A&P were hauled to both of them. 

I tried in vain to get information about what was presented. I got nothing.  I was getting most of my information from a friend whose son told her everything. Feeling jealous and let down, I figured I was being frozen out of the purity information.  But I thought I'd try anyway.

Wednesday at dinner I said to them "Just tell me one thing that you learned at church." Peter replied, "one in four people has an STD." Hey, that's pleasant. I kept myself together and asked "What do you do to keep from getting an STD?" Loaded question, not sure where this is going to go.... Andrew says emphatically, "KEEP YOUR PANTS ON!"  Oh good. That's great advice. Every time you leave the house for the rest of your life, I will implore you to KEEP YOUR PANTS ON.  They learned something!

Later when downloading with Tim, he confessed that Peter had shared in the car on the way home that one in four people has an STD.  This is how this conversation went.

P: One in 4 people has an STD
T: Well, I don't have an STD... so I'm pretty sure neither of you has an STD.... and there are 4 people in our family... who does that leave?

Nice, thanks.