Listening is Important

No Child Left Behind has definitely left No Child Untested. Today was the first part of several for the State Achievement tests.

With hyper vigilance, one twin has spent the last few weeks preparing and answering extra test questions to ensure his readiness.

With a calm that is nearly zen-like, the other twin has tumbleweeds blowing around in his skull. Test? Not worried, not one bit.

Our 3:00 Eastern Drinking Time ritual is their call to me to assure me they haven't been locked in the locker by roving bands of bullies or otherwise incapacitated at school. My phone rings...


(Note my first mistake: I cannot tell them apart by voice and I didn't ask who it was allowing someone to take serious advantage of my afternoon addled brain.)


Me: So, how was the test?

Kid: It was OK.

Me: Did you finish the sections? Did you get stumped? Break your pencil?

Kid: I lost focus. I stared into space a lot.

Me: WHAT? You lost focus? You were so ready! What happened?

Kid: The teacher said it's hard to focus for long periods so they said to take a break. I rested my brain by staring into space.

Me: During the entire test? Did they come clonk a cow bell next to your head to wake you up?

Kid: Na, it was OK.

Me: Wait, you're kidding right?

Kid: Ya, wanna talk to Andrew?

ARGH.

Me: Hey Andrew, how was the test?

Kid: Fine. Did you talk to my orthodontist?

Me: Yes, you have the first appointment Monday.

Kid: WHAT? I'm getting head gear on Monday?

Me: I'm hanging up.

Oh Please, when does the listening gene kick in? They are so totally messing with my head.

On the other hand, Henry probably never messed with his parents' heads- I believe they always had the woodshed to prevent such hilarities. Alas, poor Henry, dead at 10 in 1852, his grave sliding into the ravine, never would have pretended to be someone else on the phone. (Yes, anachronistic, but I still have a point!)