Sunday, December 28, 2008

Stinky Bacon

Thomas Jefferson once said, "I had rather be shut up in a very modest cottage with my books, my family and a few old friends, dining on simple bacon, and letting the world roll on as it liked, than to occupy the most splendid post, which any human power can give. "

I'm not sure I'd be happy to be closed up in a small house with bacon, especially not stinky bacon. Before I get to the stinkier aspects of this post, I was amazed by the sheer volume of bacon related information on the web- including the Royal Bacon Society and their holiday picture of a bacon adorned Christmas tree. Truly, wonders NEVER cease.

This morning I made stinky bacon and I am officially a bacon enabler. Let me first state that I do like bacon- I don't mind it, I cook with it and I've been known to pack away BLT's with the best of them. However, there is bacon from a certain bacon purveyor that is the stinkiest stuff ever. It leaves a lingering scent of smoke in the house for days. It tastes like a campfire. It is Tim's favorite thing.

The bacon purveyor, Mom Wilson's is located north of Columbus, Ohio and whenever anyone travels within the one hundred mile radius of the shop, there is a standing request for stinky bacon and other stinky pork products. Tim has been known to pack an empty cooler when heading south for loading with smoked sundries.

Me, on the other hand? I make EVERY EXCUSE I can think of to avoid stopping-

  • It's raining
  • It's snowing
  • It's cold
  • It's dark
  • It's late
  • The bacon people smell and they scare me
  • This bacon will kill you

Last trip, I tried these excuses and a few others, but after years of excuses I buckled under the pressure and stopped in to make a purchase. I had the bacon people cryovac the bacon and I wrapped it in multiple paper bags before stashing it in the cold recesses of my trunk for the trip home.

My trunk still smells like stinky bacon.

And now, so does my kitchen.


Anonymous said...

MMMMM! Bacon........

JBA said...

This comment reminds me, fondly, of Homer Simpson. What could be better than bacon and donuts?

Anonymous said...

MMMMM! Donuts........

JBA said...

I found a recipe for bacon cinnamon rolls. I'll try them this weekend. Not the same as a donut, but close, and with bacon.

Cynthia said...

Cute funny posting! Thanks for coming over to OWL blog, I promise to always write from the heart..(I'll throw a little head in there too.) I'll be back to read more from your blog.

JBA said...

Awesome! Thanks for visiting!

Captain Dumbass said...

Bacon cookies.

The Pink Cowboy said...

Bacon is the staff of life. It is indeed important to have your bacon when you want it, you deserve it. I was a vegeterian for 20 years. I fely miserable, lots of stomach aches. The three years ago I became fed up with my vegetarian neurosis. I started eating meat. I never felt better. Eating bacon has brought happiness to my life!!!!! ( Not that there isn't anything wrong with being a vegan).

Sparky ♥ ∞ and Wiregrass Steve said...

This is just too funny! Mmmmmmm ... bacon ... [drool] But, a bacon TREE??! As we say in Georgia "That boy ain't right!" [lol] My dogs would have that entire tree devoured and shredded in 3 seconds flat!

I've never packed a cooler with bacon (I would like too) but I have packed my colon with it a few times. Now THAT'S fun! :o)

Sparky ♥ ∞

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